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Birthday treats

Best thing about birthdays when you’re getting on a bit? You’ve been around long enough for everyone to get a handle on who you are and what you actually like.

I’ve spent the morning opening some rocking gifts – all of which I love (although I fear size 8 knickers might have been a bit optimistic – sadly, I have a size 8 body and a size 14 bottom).

V pleased to have put together a little birthday outfit, almost entirely of my new booty (please excuse the fact that I haven’t yet brushed my hair in this photo!).

I can’t quite believe the exceptional taste of my other half, who bought me the ‘effin bootiful All Saints Spring Forest Nami top.

It’s made from vintage samples, so they say – “an Italian high definition digital print featuring illustrations of butterflies entwined with exotic birds” – also known as “the man who bought you this blouse is gonna get some tonight”.

The lovely shoes are from the Limited Collection at M&S (thanks, mummy!) – and due to the genius that is half sizes, they fit like a glove. Why don’t ALL shoes come in half sizes, man?

And the HUGE vintage-style ring was a gift from my lovely (and incredibly stylish) 11-year-old-partner-in-fashion-crime Lily, and her family. Bought, I believe, from a cool, little boutique in Crystal Palace and definitely the biggest, sparkliest piece of costume jewellery I have ever possessed. Love it.

Now I just need to decide how to wear the top for this evening’s merriment…am thinking of teaming it with my black sequin mini skirt, tights, biker boots and HUGE hair. Dave Grohl can’t fail to be impressed.

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Written by Johanna Payton